November 3, 2024
Hieroglyphics

Have you ever stopped to consider the wild rollercoaster that is the world of the evolution of text messaging? From the era of painstakingly pressing the number ‘7’ four times to get the letter ‘S’ to the modern luxury of sending tiny pictures of shrimp, tacos, and monkeys as if they’re part of a standardized language, we’ve come a long way. And, let’s be honest, some of us still aren’t sure what half those emojis mean.

1. The Good Ol’ Days

Remember the golden age when we were limited to 160 characters and had to be creative with our spelling? “C U L8R” wasn’t just “text-speak”, it was a survival skill. There were no read receipts, and ‘BRB’ meant your friend was about to be yelled at for hogging the landline.

2. Autocorrect Adventures

Then came smartphones and the magic (or is it menace?) of autocorrect. Suddenly, your innocent texts to your mom about ‘cooking ducks’ became…well, let’s just say slightly more provocative. Thanks to autocorrect, every text became a fun game of Russian roulette.

3. Emoji Overload

Next, the emoji exploded onto the scene. Originally, they seemed innocent enough – a smiley face here, a thumbs up there. But soon, we had to learn an entirely new language where eggplants and peaches had double meanings and sending the wrong color heart could mean the end of a friendship.

4. GIFs & Memes: A Picture’s Worth a Thousand Words (or 160 Characters)

Who even needs words when you have GIFs? Want to show excitement? There’s a dancing baby for that. Sadness? Here’s a clip of a cat dramatically staring out a window.

5. Voice Messages: When You’re Too Lazy to Type

Nothing says “I can’t be bothered to type” like sending a voice message. They’re the audio equivalent of a shrug. And let’s not talk about the mini heart attack when you accidentally play one in a silent room.

6. The Typing Bubble of Doom

The tiny bubbles or ellipses that show someone’s typing, then not typing, then typing again. It’s the digital equivalent of someone opening their mouth, then thinking better of it. Whatever they’re about to say is either going to be very carefully worded or they’ve fallen asleep on their keyboard.

7. Going Full Circle: The Return of Hieroglyphics

We began our journey with the written word, got too lazy, used pictures, and now we’ve basically reverted back to ancient Egyptian communication. Hieroglyphics are back, folks! Except this time, they’re in the form of crying-laughing faces, fire symbols, and inexplicable shrimp emojis.

So the next time you’re frustrated with autocorrect or perplexed by a friend’s choice of emoji, just remember: text messaging is a wild, ever-evolving beast. And in another decade, who knows? We might be communicating with holographic interpretive dances.

But until then, happy texting!